Tuesday, 15 December 2015

BLOGMAS DAY 13- SECRET POSTS

(hello in Icelandic) sorry ended up not posting yesterday my Father decided to remove my laptop when I was brushing my teeth and so I never actually got round to posting it but oh well you have it now and you get two, you will probably (hopefully) get two tomorrow as well just so that I can catch up and also two on Thursday. Something very weird happened on this blog today, so I normally get 20ish views a say but today I have got 165 and I just kind of sat looking at my screen thinking who is reading my stuff. So please comment if you are reading because otherwise I get worried I may have a stalker. Anyway on to the post today and it is all the post that I started then never posted so prepare yourself for some cringe.

This one is called “As I see him Standing there”-

In year 8 (7th grade) I was having some serious friend problems which consisted of me being friends with many different people, this left me feeling insecure and not sure who to trust, so much so that when someone doesn’t  reply to my message I get panicky and worry that they hate me. I am now very attached to all of my friends who I trust, but that’s a whole other blog post about my life as a teenager. I am telling you my life story because this is when it all started. I began worrying about really stupid things and would come home from school crying.

Apparently I really hated my friends; this one is simply titled “friends”-

Friends, they support you, they talk to you, but most importantly they love you, but what if they don’t what if they don’t love you back? What if they are just there? Just another person?
aThen it hurts, hurts so much all you want to do is die, huddle up and die. Sometimes friendship just feels like a balloon, you can hold on to it for as long as you like but you have to take care of it, or it will pop and float away never to be seen again, but what happens when you’re protecting the balloon, but actually you’re only holding the string, the balloon has floated away. That’s how I feel at the moment, I always try to take care of things and find it hard to hurt anything, and if I do hurt something I will be like a broken disk stuck on saying sorry. Which is why my friendships last, or so I thought. Now I just feel like my friend has floated away and all I’m left with is the string that I’m supposed to use to try and tie everything up, fix what can’t be fixed.

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So there are actually only two posts that I have written then never finished but I also want to give you a link to some of my favourite posts that I have written this year


Honestly I love these posts they remind me of when I wasn’t as confident and when I wasn’t the strong person that I have become. Anyway I hope you liked that throwback post.

Lots of love Tavia xxx

Bless( goodbye in icelandic) my favourite so far